A Visit from St. Stephen

Copied from the Lethbridge Herald
Monday, 22 December 2008

’Twas just days before Christmas, and all through the House,
With Parliament prorogued, and no one about,
The calculating genius set to his work.
There were seats to be filled! No prerogative to shirk.
Setting aside any talk about changing the Senate,
The timing was right to dispense with that tenet.
No elections are needed when loyal Tories abound,
Announced at this time, they’d make barely a sound.
So clad in a sweater-vest, a populist nugget,
The PM opened a goody bag, so full who could lug it?
Inside were fat pay cheques, appointments nearly for life, a pension, free travel — no economic strife!
With a seat in the Red Chamber, your future is set,
Promises broken? For sure, but voters forget.
The critics were howling, “It’s undemocratic!”
But St. Stephen can quickly brush off all that static.
With faithful rewarded from coast to coast,
No one from Alberta, where we’d much rather vote.
Even with 18 senators, most leaning right,
The Grit majority in the Chamber is still water-tight.
“Now Manning! Now Dickson ! Now Gerstein and Wallin!
“On Duffy! On Greene! The Senate’s a-callin’!”
To the top of the patronage heap you will go,
To the tune of six million in taxpayers’ dough.
With the goody bag empty and Ms. Jean buying him time,
The PM is now due for a holiday sublime.
Fear not a coalition, nor taxpayers’ ire.
January will be ripe for that kind of fire.
And so with the PMO’s considerable might,
Best wishes for Christmas, and to all a good night.
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